Do not know what I am looking for , trying too many things at the same time , Search is still on ? salvation , evolution ,consciousness, disillusioned , denial may be !!
May be some day I will find purpose or come across Sach for my existence , what , where ,how ,no idea. My eternal energy keeps on pushing me to find some meaning to the life and beyond.
Still I feel that materialistic world is not that bad ,we need to reinvent & move on , there is happiness everywhere. Sometime I feel our brain should also have some facility to permanently delete selective odd memories (ctrl-alt-del) & keep good ones only , but then how we will differentiate what is good !! Oh..
Or there is nothing , I may be using jugglery of sophisticated words to make myself happy or it is just to quench my spiritual hunger ,or I am forcing myself for some cinematic illusions in my otherwise simple happy life ,or may be just to fill the void we sometime experience, after all some time we all lie to ourselves. I think we all feel satisfied after going through some pain in order to enjoy happiness in much better way,it feel so good it hurts. I am destined to this sense of disillusion ,I am still having butterflies in my stomach , still ?? what I am searching for ,will get or no …
Shayad , Nahi , May be
Too complicated , just look at what Woodey Allen said , which I luv to misunderstand or interpret conveniently each time as per situation which suits me.I read this for happiness not love or love in broader perspective.
Woody Allen: Love and Death
“To be happy is to love, to be happy, then, is to suffer, but suffering makes one unhappy, therefore, to be unhappy one must love, or love to suffer, or suffer from too much happiness — I hope you're getting this down.
To love is to suffer. To avoid suffering, one must not love. But, then one suffers from not loving. Therefore, to love is to suffer, not to love is to suffer, to suffer is to suffer. To be happy is to love, to be happy, then, is to suffer, but suffering makes one unhappy, therefore, to be unhappy one must love, or love to suffer, or suffer from too much happiness — I hope you're getting this down.”
Sab blogging ka chemical locha hey.
